Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Up, Up, and Away!

Last week, we were treated to a real-time drama, played out on television, where a 7 year old boy might just be in danger, as he floated in a homemade helium balloon over the Colorado countryside. The entire nation watched as eyewitness news teams covered the event, all speculating on the boy's condition. In the end, it was determined to be a hoax, and the thrill of the chase was over.

The Colorado sheriff in the case, told reporters, that he believed the family was innocent, and it was just an accident. 24 hours later, he changed his mind!
The first time I saw this family on TV, I could tell there was something wrong. The father did all the talking, and he hardly sounded like a man who nearly lost a son. He was obnoxious, and arrogant during the interviews, to say the least, and the fake crocodile tears did little to diffuse that vibe. If he want's to be an actor, this man needs to go back to school, because he's the worst I've ever seen!
In the meantime, the sheriff never asked the obvious questions.
First off, why the hell were the kids not in school? It seems funny that they were all just hanging out at home on a schoolday.
Next, how in the heck did the family get enough $$ to buy a bunch of helium, and mylar to build a balloon?
And, why would any responsible adult name their kid "Falcon"?? I had a 1962 Ford Falcon, and it was not very reliable. It finally lost the main bearings on the Indiana Toll Road, in a grand display of smoke.
This Falcon was history!
Fast forward to 2009, the Falcon in the story had allegedly climbed into the balloon to go for a ride, but in reality, had climbed up into the attic over the garage to hide.

The cynic in me says this is just one in a long line of hoaxes, perpetrated to give someone their 15 minutes of fame. The family made sure they hit every news show on the circuit, in order to make their case, but it was on the Larry King Show on CNN, that things began to unravel. Falcon (the kid, not the Ford) stated that he hid and pretended to be the victim "for the show". The news media finally put two and two together, and figured out that this was pure BS.
Thousands of dollars were spent chasing the runaway balloon. All manner of law enforcement followed it's every move, while flight paths were shut down in order to provide a safe passage for the "Balloon Boy".

ABC news had interviewed another hoaxer the day after the "Balloon Boy" debacle, and he mentioned some of the great hoaxes of our time. Like the "Runaway Bride", who faked an abduction to cover up the fact that she was, in my opinion, fugly!

He also mentioned the biggest scam so far, which has cost us thousands of lives....WMD's.
The US invaded Iraq in order to neutralize chemical weapons. Since there were none, a new cause had to be manufactured, and there was nothing to base this fear mongering on. WMD's were invented! They have no definition, much like the word "stuff". The whole hoax depended upon American's fear that them "Al Keidies" were gonna do something to us!
As with any hoax, the truth finally came out, but not without a great loss of life.

I wonder if any hoax is worth that? And what of Falcon? If he goes back to school, will he be a hero, or villan? Only time will tell, but parents, PLEASE don't name your kid something stupid. You never know when he'll be on the national news!

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