Friday, January 21, 2011

"Watch Out For That Treeeeeeee!"

Once upon a time, many years ago, there was a cartoon series that featured a handsome, but rather dumb character called "George of the Jungle". George wasn't the sharpest when it came to swinging from the jungle's vines, in fact he usually miscalculated, and swung smack dab into a tree. In fact the show's theme songs lyrics always included the line "Watch out for that tree!" In the end, he somehow got the situation under control, and saved the day.

The reason I mentioned George, happens to be a viral video going around right now, featuring a woman in a shopping mall texting while walking. She's so wrapped up in what she's doing, that she fails to see a fountain in her path, and promptly falls into it. She emerges from the water, seemingly unscathed, and proceeds to pick up her phone from the watery depths, and walk away (dripping wet) looking none the worse for the experience. Cathy Cruz Marraro of Reading PA became an overnight sensation by falling into the water, but the security personnel at the Berkshire Mall should really get the credit here. They posted the video to YouTube, and the rest, as they say, is history. On the video, you can hear the security people laughing and giggling as they replay the tape over and over again. Like George, this klutz is the victim of her own miscalculation, and ends up in the water.

Most people would be content to laugh off the video, and perhaps lay low until the sensation wears off, but not Ms. Marraro. She hired a lawyer, and threatened to sue Berkshire Mall's security force for not aiding her. Personally, if I worked security there, I would have gotten on the PA system and yelled "Hey Flipper, get outta the pool!" Then again, that's just me. She claimed that the "video watched 'round the world" made her look foolish (Really?), and since she worked at the mall, subjected her to taunts from coworkers. Though she's not looking for monetary damages, she does want an apology from the mall. "Gosh Cathy, we're really, really sorry we put that fountain where you wanted to walk".

Mind you, the video never shows a face, even though we see it from two angles. There really is no proof that the texting twit actually was her. But she insisted it indeed was her, and she wanted some sort of compensation for her now world famous dive. Appearing on ABC's "Good Morning America", she railed against the mall security for not coming to her aid, or at least not checking to see if she injured herself. She appeared near tears at some points during the interview, and I'm sure a lot of people felt genuine sympathy for her. Not me.

First off, the video was anonymous, no one appeared to see it happen, and she just walked away without there ever being a clear shot of her face. Secondly, the tears she shed on the show looked to be forced. Had there been a bullshit detector in the studio, I have no doubt it would have gone off. She could have been auditioning for the job of Speaker of the House (sorry Mr. Boner) they were so phony! The show ended, and nothing more was mentioned , but the story doesn't end quite yet.

It seems that right after the show, MS. Marraro and her lawyer had a court appearance on something totally unrelated to her infamous flop. It seems that she was charged in October 2009, of stealing a co-worker's credit cards, and buying over $5000 worth of merchandise with them. Not to mention her previous theft charges, and a hit and run charge. Ms. Marraro apparently has some splainin' to do here. Was this a scam to extort money from Berkshire Mall? Is this whole thing just for a quick cash payment, while the real victim dries out? We may never know, but we learned the dangers of texting and doing nearly anything. Oh yeah, we got a good laugh as well!

So, as George of the Jungle sails head first into a waiting tree, and Cathy Marraro falls into a waiting fountain, I mist bid you all adieu, but not before you watch the video again!

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